November 26, 2008

Three Rotten Bananas = Dessert

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Even though we’re going to a friend’s house and I don’t have to cook, I cook. My family and many of the additional kids we have added over the years usually drop by over the long weekend. “Where are the left-overs? There’d better be some stuffing left!” So even when I don’t cook the dinner for the official celebration, I cook the day before because I enjoy it and because it makes everybody happy. Today is the day. And it continues the tradition from when our children were toddlers. Get rid of every left over in the refrigerator. Turn it into something. The only time it gets thrown away is when is fails the smell test. Otherwise, the game is- what was this before? Mom never throws anything away. Generally, the sauce for something, a new bucket of soup, or the contents of a pie are good places to examine. Over time I learned to put old salad in vinegar water, boil it, and then put it in the blender. Free soup with a couple of bullion cubes. It’s really good. (I swear it is true!) But the real question over the years has always been- what did she do with the rotten bananas?

It used to be that bananas were 7 cents a pound when we lived in Manhattan in the late 60s. We had very little money and when you got a bargain like that you bought as many as you thought you could figure out a way to use. But when those bananas got black and gooey it was time to throw them away. Not so fast. When nobody was looking I saved the parts without any mold or yuck on them, mashed them up, and usually made some kind of cake or bread, combining banana goo with the remnants I could shake out of cereal boxes. When they were young, my kids thought every kind of cake or bread had a banana flavor. Today’s bananas were on sale at 77 cents a pound, so the three dark brown ones on the counter this morning didn’t stand a chance. I whipped those babies up into a three layer cake that now sits in the middle of the kitchen table. Before the end of the day, I expect my son to whisper, “How many rotten bananas are in that cake, Mom?” with a big smile. And there won’t be a crumb left. No leftovers.

If life were only as simple as using rotten bananas! By this time of year we accumulate so many left-overs- left over anger, left over questions never answered, left over dreams. Thanksgiving can bring back all of those yearnings of things unfinished, while we go through the ritual of giving praise and Thanksgiving for the abundance of life even in difficult times. The flipside of this are those who get depressed during the holidays. They are alone, or hate the sleaziness of Christmas come too early. Family get-togethers do them in. They hate the fake smiles and the air of competition as one family member after another tells of the year’s events and accomplishments. But how about those at the table who have had a terribly year, or don’t want to share a story because they cannot compete with cousin Tommy. The way we balance these individual needs around the table of plenty is much like the way some of us have come to balance our place at the special education table. Some do a lot of bragging. Some just listen. Others are just starting. Some complain so loudly we can’t hear anyone else.

Two weeks ago I posted a YouTube video, Special Education, Yes We Can. It invited parents to join a new coalition of special education in order to try and remedy the present mess of special education in America. By the time of this Thanksgiving blog, 995 hits have been made on that video. Many emails have also been posted on a special email address created for that video- glovespti@yahoo.com. As I look back at the last eleven months, I am deeply thankful for the response to this video effort. It is never too late. We can always turn something bad into something good if we try. There is room at the table for everyone in every capacity. For now, I am just the cooker before the big event. Cleaning out the bad stuff, using what we can, forming it into something else that is tasty. If you want to get involved in rethinking special education, email the glovespti@yahoo.com address. The table has seats for everybody. Happy Thanksgiving.